Been Awhile/Just Friends

It's been sometime since I put up a post, so I decided to come by and write a little about what was on my mind. I'll try to put up some recent pictures and talk a little more about what going on with me. Until I get that post completed I decided to talk about something that recently happened to me. While catching up with an "old" friend it came up in conversation too so I decided to talk about this today. What do you do when someone says to you, "I just want to be friends."?

I'm sure a flurry of things start to run through your head when you hear this. Maybe some tears start to flow. Something might even get thrown. In this day and age anything is possible. Who knows? Do you?

If you are the person getting the news:

What did I do to make this happen?! Will I be able to just his or her friend? F!ck you, buddy!

If you are the person delivering the news:

Is this the right choice? The biggest question is "What to do?".

Recently I've been hanging out with this chic. Nothing too serious. Just casually dating and feeling each other out, but during the course of feeling her out I've come to the decision that we would make better friends than lovers.I'm sure you're thinking that things like this happen and I'm quite sure they do, but just not to me. I'm 99.9% sure that she is way more into me than I'm into her and that's where the complication begins. The other problem is she works for one of the urban radio stations here in town. The last thing I want is to be put on "blast" during her shift on air.

Can you be just the person's friend and talk to them occasionally?Can this work?

Chances are not but for some it's worth trying because maybe you will be one of the few that can handle this situation. I just don't want her holding on with the hopes of getting together,setting herself up for lots of pain. I rarely ever change my mind. That's why I think it's important to tell the her that we cannot talk to for awhile. If the she gets upset...oh well. You need to take care of me. Is it wrong?

I don't want to stay with her you knowing my feelings have changed. I guess I'm overall concerned about finding the best way to tell her.

6 comments:

Brad said...

Your right to tell her open and honestly. Feelings will only grow more intense. It may hurt her now but it's the right thing to do. Better now before more is invested.

Shell said...

Yes, tell her asap. It will save both of you time and energy in the long run.

Life, Love And Lola said...

How about friends with benefits?

Live.Love.Eat said...

Not really complicated at all. We make things complicated by anticipating too much, what we will say, how will they respond. You can't help the way you feel but you can help how you deliver the news. Texting = blast deserved. Email = blast deserved. So, just come right out and tell her it's not working out for you on your end and you're really sorry. I wouldn't even go into the whole "just want to be friends." That's a given but by saying it out loud you open up all the other questions like will we get together blah blah blah. Just keep it simple. This isn't working out for me and I am truly sorry!!!!!!

fiwa said...

Just be honest and tell her the truth. You can do that and still be kind.

Good luck.

Mo said...

You never did tell me if old referred to my age or how long we have known one another. ????

And for the record I am glad you clarified it was someone local you are having this type of situation with. We don't want folks thinking you are talking about us.

And yes, I did say just friends so there. ***pffft***